Disappointment With Reality

"Resist any thoughts that may evoke feelings of disillusionment and disappointment with reality"

~Every Woman's Battle by Shannon Ethridge 

How many times a day do you feel disappointed? I'm not referring to traumatic, moments of havoc. All terrible tragedies aside, we tend to get disappointed on a daily basis (sometimes hourly for me!). Maybe you didn't get complimented on your new outfit. Or none of the guys in a group setting are paying attention to you. You're disappointed. Now, how many times do you daydream during the day? There is a strong connection between disappointment and delusion. Unfortunately, there is an even stronger connection between disappointment and becoming greedy, desperate, and even more heartbroken than you were in the first place. 

I think I should apologize. On July 7th of 2010, I wrote the post Daydream (read ME). Within that post, I said that it's okay to daydream as long as it's "fun, fleeting, and harmless". Well, with another year of experience under my belt, I will humbly admit that I WAS WRONG. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! I'M SORRY IF I LEAD YOU ASTRAY!

Daydreaming CANNOT be fun, fleeting or harmless for single people. I've tried and failed. Tried again. Failed again. It's not happening.

Take A Look At Your Life

All of us have at least one guy that we used to like for no good reason. And now that we are away from him and sane (out of sight, out of mind!), we ask ourselves and our friends, "What on earth was I thinking?! Why did you let me like him for so long?" 


List all the guys you never should have begun to like.

I have two in mind, right off the top of my head. Looking back at my journal, I see that before I met Guy #2, I went to a banquet ... where none of the guys had asked to me to dance. They asked a few of my friends, but not me. It must have been an important fact because I wrote it down. I was disappointed. By the time I met Guy #2 shortly after, I was so wiling and ready to be affirmed and validated as a human being. I wanted him to compliment me and ask me questions about my life. I wanted him to think I was special--more special than any other girl in our work environment. And simultaneously, I was daydreaming. My disappointment brought me visions of what we would look like as a couple. And questions like, "Will he hold my shopping bags? Will he come into the store with me or wait outside?", kept popping into my mind. These were not rational thoughts and they threatened to control me.

Disappointment leads to illogical disillusionment. This is a warning. Watch out for it.

Now it's time for you to look at your life. Which guys did you like and ultimately use as an emotional outlet, due to a little disappointment?

Rather encouraging the urge to daydream (and telling yourself, "So what? It's fun!"), why don't you try to starve it instead? You'll save yourself a lot of time being infatuated with someone who is not worth it.

Love,

Zabrinah