Seamlessly Integrate

You meet a guy. He's lovely. And he thinks you're lovely, too. You go on a first date. He says, "I'm really only looking for something casual. What about you?" You think carefully before responding with: "Oh yeah, me too. I'm looking for something casual, as well." That's not the truth, now is it? You're hoping that you can lure him in with how wonderful you are, and subsequently change his mind so that he decides to be with you in the long-term. Guess what? That's not possible. 

This post is very simple. There is one rule I need you to always remember--one question you should continuously ask yourself.

Can he seamlessly integrate into my life right now?

In other words, can you take him as he is? RIGHT NOW? If the answer is "yes", let the relationship continue. See how it plays out. If the answer is "no" or "he has some growing up to do" (you can only use that excuse when you're in high school), then you need to seriously readjust your expectations.

A guy that smokes cigarettes today could very well be a smoker 30 years into marriage. If he flirts with other women now, I can guarantee that he'll still be flirting on his deathbed. If he only wants a "casual relationship" with you, then that's the way he'll always feel. If you're having trouble believing me, please read Guys Will Tell You (right HERE).

I agree that people can change, but you don't base relationships on that hope. Please read .001% Rule over HERE.

Don't forget to ask yourself that little question. It has the power to save you from MAJOR heartbreak when he doesn't change a week later--or even years down the road.


Love,

Zabrinah