He's Immature

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Does he cry for constant attention? He can’t do anything by himself? Does he always say whatever comes to his mind before thinking? He’s too goofy. And not in a cute way. He misbehaves. He cares WAY too much about what all the other boys think. He’s extremely prone to peer pressure. In other words, he’s immature. The two of you simply aren’t at the same maturity level.


So, what do you do about it?

We need to consider the numerous types & factors of immaturity. Some are okay in moderation. Some are even cute on rare occasions. We’re all childish at times. But sometimes, it’s downright annoying. It will drive you crazy. Immature guys cannot go unnoticed for too long. I find them quite easy to identify, though they come in many different varieties.

The golden key to spotting Mr. Immature is to listen to his stories. When you ask him about himself and what he has accomplished in life, does he brag about things that aren’t brag-worthy? Like the time he got drunk in a foreign country and all his money disappeared? Or how about the time he got arrested for urinating on the subway tracks? Don’t be impressed, my friends. Don’t be flattered that he’s sharing his past with you. Just smile, nod, and walk away in the opposite direction. You’ve found a Mr. Immature, and now it’s time to lose him.



Here are some other types and identifiers of immature guys:


Type #1: He spends too much time on the couch, watching cartoons or playing videogames. His Wii comes first. And if he doesn’t get his full allotment of couch time, he’s in a bad mood. Not only does this behavior call for immaturity, it’s laziness, too. Let me clarify: If he only does this for two hours on the weekends, then no big deal. You should play the videogame with him! See if you can beat his top score! But, if he spends far too much time with the television, things could get out of hand. Your relationship might be in jeopardy because he values you less than a box with moving pictures.


Type #2: He’s unreliable. Always making promises, but rarely keeping them. Not a good basis for a relationship.


Type #3: He doesn’t want to settle down with you or isn’t ready to date monogamously. He’s too immature to realize how special you are. In this case, don’t wait for him. Don’t tell him that you’ll still be available if he happens to change his mind. You are in command. You are so much better than that.


Type #4: He throws tantrums. He’s overly defensive and when you question who he is or try to get his guard down, he gets mad for no reason. You didn’t provoke him at all, and yet, you’re the one wondering what you did wrong. His tantrums are another form of avoidance. And you really don’t need someone with issues that deep. Especially, if he has no interest in dealing with them.

Type #5: He doesn’t like to try new things. Have you ever given a child a piece of food they’ve never had before? You give a little boy a piece of broccoli, and he’ll only try the tiniest bit before he makes a face and spits it out. He gives up far too easily. If your potential love interest does the same, then he’s immature. He doesn’t fight for what he wants. He’s far too dependent. And he doesn’t like change. When you ask him to go jogging with you instead of watching morning cartoons, Mr. Immature will make a face and try his best to get out of it. He is a child in a man’s body, and you don’t need any of that.




When it’s gone too far, you can either leave him or hope he eventually grows out of it. Remember the post, .001% (if not, click here)? You cannot force him to change. He will most likely interpret your pleas as nagging, which will only push the two of you farther apart.



Are you the type of person who is always growing? I am. I jump from one level to the next, one new step to the next—and I always prefer to have the people I love jumping right with me. And even when they can’t or don’t want to participate in what I’m doing, they give me their full support. That’s maturity.



I also like to nurture and take care of people. I don’t mind being there for someone when they need me. But, immature guys take advantage of that. Even if you enjoy treating him like a baby, it’s not necessarily healthy—for either of you. An immature man will not find the time to support your growth in between his videogames and his childish behavior. If you’re consistently developing and he’s stagnant, it won’t work.



Stef Lang’s song, Mr. Immature (click here for the music video) was the direct inspiration for this post.

It appropriately ends with:

“If I wanted a child,

Then I would have had a baby.

I need a man,

Not a boy that drives me crazy.”

Love,


Zabrinah



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