You Forget

There are clearly over a million, legitimate, reasons not to like this guy in a romantic way, so why do you keep imagining a bright future and a fairytale ending for the two of you? Why do you try to sit next to him every chance you get? Why can’t you just see him as a friend? Why do you have to take it to that fuzzy, gooey, place of unrequited love? The way you feel is not unconquerable. We can beat this.

What’s happening? Why won’t my mind stay in the friend zone?

Because he’s your friend, you tend to notice and linger on his good qualities in the same way we admire our friends who are girls. We like that they’re nice, ambitious, and we even adore their beauty from time to time. We envy their gorgeous hair, curvy figures, and awesome wardrobes. So, when this friend of yours is a guy, you admire his great personality, good looks, and intellect. You focus solely on his good qualities as he becomes more and more ideal for you. You begin to think that your future husband should have those qualities too. But you’re forgetting a great deal of information. Every time you register something bad—something that reminds you he isn’t the one—you take that negative fact and bury it. You forget.

Why?

No one wants to daydream about bad stuff. You don’t want to imagine the day he cheats on you or the day you sign the papers for an inevitable divorce. You don’t want to visualize the fighting, the loneliness, and the misery that will accompany this relationship if it ever came to fruition.


But I think it’s beneficial to remember the bad right now. Thoroughly mix it in with the good. You can still be the best of friends, spend all of your free time with him, and know that the two of you will never be romantically involved. It’s possible. You are in command of your own mind. You have a good head on your shoulders. Trust it more.



Love,


Zabrinah