Recap

The guy you’re trying not to fall in love with talked to you today! You were walking around with your friends and you said “Hi” to him. You know, just to be nice. And he wanted to have a conversation with you, but he got all flustered. He forgot what he wanted to say. But, you were cool and confident. When he finished stumbling over his words, you walked away with your friends, convinced that he likes you, and you’re somehow torturing him by not liking him back. You and your friends sit down and talk for hours about what he said and how he said it. You recap.

Have you ever recapped a situation that just happened three seconds ago? Have you ever recapped the same situation for people who were there to witness it? And have you ever recapped a recap? I have been guilty of all of the above. I am the Queen of Recap, but I’m trying to change.

Why? What’s wrong with recapping?

Nothing, really. It’s good to review your day and what happened. Except when it comes to the guy you have chosen not to fall for. Recapping gives him too much importance in your life. Excessive recapping brings you to a Level 2 on the “How Much I Like A Guy” Meter when you really want to be a Level 1. Instead of thinking about him all the time and wanting him to call you or ask you out, you want to not dislike him.


Recapping is not just talking about your interactions with him. It’s reviewing them in your head too. Wondering why you dream about him? Recapping before going to bed can do that. Wondering why he’s always on your mind? Well, if you’re always going over what he said or how close he was to you when he said it, then he probably is always on your mind.

Don’t forget Reciprocity (an earlier post). Is he honestly recapping as much as you? Or is he going on with his day? Does he even remember that important conversation you can’t stop thinking about?

You made a decision not to fall in love with him. Your mind knows what’s best in these instances. Your common sense needs just as much input as your sweaty palms and stammering heart. But we often give more weight to our body’s reactions than our minds. If he’s definitely, definitely someone you shouldn’t love—he’s taken or a player—then you need to seriously step back from all of the daydreaming and reconsider if you should continually recap the situation, or just let it go and move on.



Love,


Zabrinah